


To Die For

by timeforlupsopinion (jazzhandslazuli)



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, Pushing Daisies AU, but it's mostly not sad, character death warning natch because of the premise of the fic, wake pies and make the dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-09-03
Packaged: 2018-12-21 08:43:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11940492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jazzhandslazuli/pseuds/timeforlupsopinion
Summary: Kravitz is a private detective who's pretty damn good at his job. Mostly due to his supernatural ability to bring the dead back to life. He's also pretty good at making sure they go back to being dead again and keeping the balance of life and death in check. Or he was, until he takes on the murder case of his first love and high school sweetheart, Taako.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I had to because I couldn't not. This might be a standalone fic but i do have a lot of ideas for future chapters regardless of whether or not i write them. I just promise not to make any promises.

It’s not hard for Kravitz to break into a funeral home. No one bats an eye at a man in a dark suit with a somber expression going about as he pleases, and he finds Taako’s casket quickly, shoved away in a back room in the time between his viewing this morning and the burial this afternoon. It’s been ten years, but Kravitz would have recognised him again even if he weren’t looking. Older, hair longer and its natural dark shade instead of the bubblegum hues Kravitz remembered from high school, but still very much the same Taako. And Kravitz is very much still enamoured.  _ You’re here to solve a murder,  _ he reminds himself.  _ Not fawn overyour high school crush.  _

He’s going to be buried in a brightly coloured silk shirt and if Taako in his mid twenties is anything like Taako in his teens then  _ damn right,  _ he wouldn’t be caught dead in a boring old suit. 

The sixty second time limit already feels too short, and it hasn’t even begun yet.

What does he even say?  _ Sorry you’re dead. Sorry I accidentally killed your aunt. Still kind of in love with you even though we haven’t spoken in ten years. Because I felt guilty about killing your aunt.  _

Let’s just start with the murder. 

Kravitz reaches for Taako’s hand, and sets the timer. 

Taako reanimates with a deep breath and sits up immediately, eyes wide as he takes in his surroundings.

“Shit, Toto,” he says. “I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.”

Kravitz fights the urge to laugh, because  _ of course  _ those were the first words out of his undead mouth. “Taako, we don’t have a lot of time, and there’s a lot I need to explain-”

“I’m dead, yeah?” he says. “I kind of figured by the fact I’m in a person sized box surrounded by flowers.” He takes a moment to examine his outfit. “Damn right they’re not gonna bury me in a suit.”

“Right, you’re dead,” says Kravitz. “And I’m here to solve your murder. I need you to tell me everything you can about how you died.”

Taako frowns. “Uh, yeah, that one was a Taako special,” he says. “Kinda accidentally poisoned myself I guess. Probs used the wrong pesticides on my garden and owned myself.”

Kravitz frowned. “Are you… sure?”

Taako shrugs. “Sometimes the best murder mysteries are just accidents by dummies in disguise.”

This is… frustrating. The autopsy reported poisoning, but can it tell the difference between a pesticide and something else? Kravitz doesn’t have time to check. He has thirty seconds. 

“Do you have any enemies?” he asks blindly.

“Only my many, many jealous rivals and scorned lovers.” Taako stops and squints his eyes at Kravitz, and his eyes widen in recognition. “Hey, wait. Kravitz? Keetz McKravitz from high school?”

“Uh, yes?” 

“Hot shit! Can’t believe you wound up as a Grim Reaper and I wound up as a corpse. Small world, right?”

Kravitz bites his lip and his cheeks darken. “Uh… I was hoping you wouldn’t recognise me,” he says.

Taako smirks. “Wasn’t as good for you as it was for me, huh?”

“Oh, no, it definitely was. I mean.” This is a disaster. “It’s just hard to remain objective about death around your first kiss, I suppose.”

“I was your  _ first _ ? That’s so cute.” His grin is wide but his cheeks are the slightest bit warmer. “Also, what’s with the terrible,  _ terrible  _ accent?”

Kravitz laughed softly, and sheepishly drops his Work Accent. “Taako you of all people would understand the appeal of playing up the mysterious British Grim Reaper aesthetic to its fullest potential.” Taako snickers. Twenty seconds. “We don’t have a lot of time left, Taako, but, uh…” He should apologise. It was that dumb mistake that got them separated in the first place. Kravitz bringing his mother back, and to keep life and death in balance, the only other adult in the vicinity had to die instead: Taako and Lup’s aunt. 

And Kravitz didn’t even get to keep his mother in the end.

And how could he explain all this in twenty seconds? 

“Hey, uh, can you find Lup and tell her I love her?” says Taako, before Kravitz can say anything. “I mean she already knows but like tell her anyway. And like, tell her not to touch my shit.”

Kravitz smiles. “I’ll do my best.”

“And, uh, while we’re being serious I guess, you were mine too,” he says, looking down at his hands, and Kravitz can’t tell if he’s just imagining his cheeks getting pink. “My first kiss. I was kinda condescending about it and that’s not who I want to go out as. You were my first kiss, too.” And then suddenly he looks up with half a smirk and leans forward a little. “And my last?” Taako asks.

Kravitz’s eyes widen. “What?”

“First kiss and last? Some might say it’s poetic or symmetrical or whatever, but really I just want to kiss a hot dude as Taako’s last action on planet Earth. You wouldn’t say no to a guy on his deathbed, would you?” He flashes a grin. Kravitz’s entire face is hot. 

“...I suppose I wouldn’t.”

“Nice.”

This is not how these things are supposed to go, with Taako’s face so close to his he can feel the breath on his lips. He just has to lean that little inch in and… done. Five seconds. He’s running out of time but he can’t command himself to move. He’s about to make another big mistake. 

Taako opens his eyes and sits back a little, eyeing Kravitz. “I was kidding, by the way. We don’t have to do it if you’re not into it.”

“Oh, no, I want to,” Kravitz said quickly. “I just-” His pocket watch beeps, and a shudder runs up his spine and acid burns in the back of his throat as somewhere nearby another soul is taken to make up for Taako’s missing one. Kravitz has made a mistake and Taako is still here, frowning quizzically. 

Taako reaches out for him, but Kravitz steps out of the way. “What if you didn’t have to die?” he says quickly. He doesn’t look at Taako. He glances at the dozens of empty caskets with a guilty pit in his stomach, avoiding the filled one that he doesn’t feel guilty about at all (which just makes him feel worse). 

Taako raises an eyebrow. “Um, I mean if that’s an option, yeah,” he says. “I kind of never intended on dying like ever so that would be preferable.”

He shouldn’t be doing this. But the wheels have already been set in motion, it’s too late to back out now. “Nobody can know you’re alive, understand?”

“Yeah, duh.”

“And we can’t touch. Ever.”

Taako looks crestfallen. “So that’s a solid no on that kiss, then?”

Kravitz snorts. “Look, I… wish we could. I touch a dead person and they come back to life, but if I do it again then they’re dead forever, no coming back.” ...Kravitz doesn’t mention the person he’s just killed, or the aunt. This is a mistake. They shouldn’t be doing this.

“It’s going to be difficult to pull off… how good are you with tight spaces, Taako?”

They’re doing this. 

 

Taako’s funeral is surprisingly… funerary. Kravitz was sure for a second that Taako wouldn’t allow people to mourn for him. Then again, Taako wouldn’t be satisfied without at least three weeping widows and some wailing. 

Kravitz waits at the back, a stranger, an intruder among Taako’s closest family and friends. The party dwindles, one by one. No one recognises him. No one notices him. 

“...Kravitz?”

Kravitz jumps. He didn’t see Lup approaching. She frowns at him. “What’re you doing here?” she asks. Her eyes are red and dark rimmed, and maybe it’s because the last time Kravitz saw her she was fifteen in a ratty band t-shirt and meticulously ripped tights, but she looks far too grown up in her funeral dress. 

“Uh. I was just passing through,” he says. “Sorry, I probably shouldn’t be here, I don’t want to intrude.”

“Oh, no, are you kidding? Taako would go crazy if he knew you were here.” Her smile is shaky. “He was in love with you for like all of high school, and half of college.” She sucks in a deep breath and squeezes her eyes shut. She exhales. “What are you even up to these days?” she asks.

“Oh, you know…” Resurrecting your brother from the dead. No big deal. “How are you? Are you holding up okay?”

“The longest amount of time I spent away from my brother was four days in middle school when I went on a school trip for a class he wasn’t in, and we slept in the same bed for like a month afterwards. So honestly? Not great, my dude.”

Kravitz frowns. “I’m sorry,” he says. Sorry for a lot of things, but mostly sorry that the words ‘your brother is still alive’ sit on his tongue but can never be let out. “He-he loves you. Loved you,” he says instead, which really seems pointless, she definitely knows that more than he would.

Lup smiles anyway. “Thanks. I gotta go do some next-of-kin stuff. But, uh, don’t be a stranger, okay?”

Kravitz nods, and Lup waves a little as she leaves. 

 

By now, the last of the stragglers have all but disappeared, and only remaining are the employees about to bury the casket. Kravitz just has to intercept them. A simple, elegant plan of lifting the handbrake off their truck and letting it roll down a hill while they all chase it. Okay, so, perhaps not elegant, but it got the job done. Kravitz is a little worried about how easy it is to grave rob in this town. 

He gets down on his knees and reaches over the edge of the grave, gently lifting it open. There’s Taako, eyes closed, so peaceful.

“Taako, get up,” says Taako. “We’ve got to leave quickly before someone investigates the man hanging out in an open grave.”

He’s silent for a moment, but then pokes out his tongue. “Bleh,” he says, eyes still closed. “I can’t hear you, I’m dead.”

Kravitz chuckles. “Guess I’ll leave you to be buried, then.” He takes a pair of gloves from his pocket and pulls them onto his hands. Taako opens one eye with a grin. Kravitz holds his hand out, and Taako takes it, pulling himself out of the grave. He immediately links his arm in Kravitz’s. “Okay, how did my funeral go? Was it rowdy?”

“Not rowdy,” says Kravitz. “Very tasteful. Everybody cried.”

“Natch.”


	2. Two Die For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cling wrap kisses, disguises, an encounter with a sister

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: okay i'm only writing one chapter of this fic  
> me, 2.5 seconds later: kiss! kiss! kiss!

Kravitz wouldn’t consider himself a light sleeper, but it’s been several years since someone has stayed in his house, and the metallic clanging from his kitchen shocks him awake. The glowing red numbers on his nightstand read 2:38, and Kravitz groans. He stretches and rubs his eyes, making his way into the kitchen. It smells amazing and warm and wholesome, nostalgic and sweet. Taako has a tray of muffins in his hands, and there’s a steel mixing bowl on the floor, splattered muffin mix everywhere. He frowns when he sees Kravitz. 

“Damn it, I knew that’d wake you,” he says. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” says Kravitz, still drinking in the scene in his half-awakeness. Taako is baking? Kravitz didn’t even know he owned baking trays. “What are you doing up?”

Taako shrugs and puts the tray down on the stovetop. “Couldn’t sleep. I just spent a week sleeping non-stop, so.”

Kravitz smiles and bends down to pick up the bowl. “Plus,” Taako adds. “I spent 20 years sleeping in the same room as somebody, and only after we got our own places did I realise I’m bad at sleeping by myself. At this point I’m pretty sure Barry hates me for kicking him out of his bed every couple of days.”

Kravitz laughs. Barry, Lup’s boyfriend, is a doctorate student at the Miller Institute. He came up in Kravitz’s research. Everyone close to Taako did. “And you know sometimes I’ll stay with Ren, or Magnus, or… Sazed. But now I guess I’ll have to be a big boy.”

Ren, his co-worker at the bakery. Magnus, a friend from college, who Kravitz knew in passing through the investigator network. Sazed… Sazed? Kravitz frowns, doesn’t recognise the name.

“Who’s Sazed?” he asks, rinsing out the bowl. 

“Oh, you know…” Taako clears his throat. Is he blushing? “Just a guy. An ex, I guess you could say. Though we weren’t really together anyway so like… you know.”

Sazed should have come up in the investigation. There were no records of him anywhere, but an ex-lover was always the prime subject of any murder case. Taako looks at Kravitz and snorts. “Are you jealous?”

“What? No? Why would I be jealous?” Taako grins even wider as Kravitz blushes deep red. Of course, he’s not jealous, but he knows how it looks. “I’m just thinking.”

“Well, you don’t have to be,” says Taako dismissively. “You’re way cuter than he was.”

“I’m not- I don’t-”

“Uh huh.” Taako arranges the muffins on a plate in an appealing pyramid and covers it with plastic wrap. 

Kravitz clears his throat and changes the subject. “I’m sorry I can’t, uh, be there to help you sleep,” he says. “It’s too risky, considering how, uh, clingy you are.”

“Excuse me, I am  _ not  _ clingy,” says Taako. He rolls out another sheet of plastic wrap.

“My memories of sleepovers with you suggest otherwise,” Kravitz teases. Lips suddenly press against his, and he falls silent, gasping, panicked. Not just lips. Lips and cold plastic. Kravitz jumps back, wide eyed, and Taako looks very self satisfied behind a sheet of plastic film. 

“Sick, I didn’t die,” he says. 

“Taako, you can’t spring that on me,” says Kravitz. “It’s incredibly dangerous.”

“Not if we’re careful. Did you enjoy it?”

“Well, yes, I mean-”

“Cool.” And he kisses Kravitz again. It’s kind of cold and weird but… so nice. Kravitz pulls away before he can do something stupid like try and pull Taako closer. 

“We should probably discuss this,” says Kravitz. “If… if this is a thing that’s happening.” He can’t stop smiling. 

“Sure thing, but not tonight. Go back to sleep, you look exhausted.” Taako taps Kravitz’s chest and turns away. 

“Will you sleep?” Kravitz asks.

“Yeah, eventually, once I tire myself out.”

 

Taako did eventually tire himself, but based on the pile of cookies and brownies that joined the muffins (Kravitz was pretty sure he didn’t even have flour in his house, so the existence of these baked goods still remains a mystery), it probably hadn’t been until the early hours of the morning. It’s going on 11am and Taako still hasn’t stirred, but that’s fine by Kravitz. He has a lot of work to do, and they have all the time in the world to sort out their, uh, other issues. 

Without a last name to go off, there’s very little information about Sazed that Kravitz can find. Even searching through Taako’s old social media accounts comes up with nothing, though there’s ample evidence of every other person on their suspect list. Taako is highly inclined towards selfies and quoting his friends out of context, even Kravitz was subjected to it in the Myspace-era. Sazed’s absence, then, says a lot more than it should. He’s a prime suspect, yet he doesn’t even seem to exist. 

Kravitz’ll have to ask Taako about it when he wakes up. That’s one advantage of the murder victim not being dead anymore. Kravitz sighs and quickly closes an article, published early this morning, about a funeral director found dead in his own funeral parlour.

That’s a problem for future Kravitz. 

There’s a knock at the door, and he jumps. Who could be here? He doesn’t get visitors…

Oh no. That’s a problem for present Kravitz. He opens the door with as nonchalant an expression as he can muster. 

“Hello, sir!” A little boy bounds into the room, arms full of books and folders, glasses about to slide off his face.

“Hello, Angus,” says Kravitz. He nods at the woman still in the doorway. “Detective Lucretia.”

She smiles at him as she enters. “Detective McKravitz.” 

“I didn’t realise we had a meeting today,” says Kravitz. Translation: he completely forgot about it.

“You were working on the Taako case yesterday, yes?” says Lucretia. “You’ve… met with the deceased, I assume?”

Lucretia and Angus are the only people in the world who know Kravitz’s secret, and it wasn’t of his own volition. The two detectives were chasing a suspect across rooftops, and the suspect misstepped, tripped, broke his neck on a ledge, fell into Kravitz where he was promptly resurrected, and then quickly killed again by Kravitz. It all happened in a split second, not even enough time for Kravitz to take it all in. But Lucretia and Angus are the most astute individuals on the planet, and saw everything. 

“Yes,” says Kravitz. “I met with him, but it was a bit of a futile endeavour. He’s convinced he was cross contaminated by pesticides.”

“Can pesticide poisons survive the cooking process?” Angus asks, writing all this in his notebook. “I was under the impression they were designed not to do that.”

Kravitz isn’t sure exactly what the relationship is between Lucretia and Angus, or why she allows a twelve year old to assist in investigations, but the boy has certainly cracked more cases than Kravitz has, so it’s not like he could judge. 

“There was also an ex mentioned,” says Kravitz. “One who hasn’t turned up in any of my research. Does the name Sazed mean anything to you?”

“No, but it’s a good place to start,” says Lucretia. She smirks a little. “How’d you even get onto the topic of exes?”

His cheeks darken. This isn’t a conversation he wanted to have right now… or ever. “Uh… I might have been one. At one point.”

Lucretia frowns. “Kravitz, that’s a conflict of interest. If you had mentioned that I wouldn’t have sent you.”

“I… didn’t think he would even recognise me,” says Kravitz. “But he did, and we got our only lead out of it.”

Lucretia sighs. “Fine, but you should let me know in the future. We wouldn’t want anything to happen.” Too late. She stands up. “If there’s nothing else you can think of-”

And he would have been in the clear, if things happened the way you wanted them to. 

“Hey, Krav, do you have a- oh.” Taako stands in the hallway, frozen in place, eyes wide as he takes in the visitors. Kravitz knows exactly how this looks, Taako bed-headed in an old sweater from Kravitz’s college days and very little else. And if his visitors were anyone else, they’d show discretion and sheepishly look away before they could associate a face with a name. A preferable option, really. But Lucretia and Angus are the most observant people on the planet. 

“Hello, sir!” Angus says, all chipper. He squints at Taako. “Are you a friend of Mr Kravitz? Because you look very familiar.”

Lucretia didn’t even play the game. She glowers at Kravitz. “Do you want to explain why there’s a dead man standing in your hallway, Detective?” She says through gritted teeth. 

Taako glances between the three of them in the living room. “I can explain, Director Whoever,” he says casually. “It’s my fault. I pretty much forced Kravitz’s hand in this one.”

Lucretia narrows her eyes at Taako, and Kravitz’s mouth hangs agape. Taako picks at his nails, bored and disinterested. “Did he tell you the consequences?” Lucretia asks. “Of living beyond your allotted sixty seconds?”

“Uh, yeah,” says Taako. “I’m just an asshole. Listen, I really want to haunt people and get back at my enemies and I don’t care who gets in trouble because of it.”

Kravitz shakes his head and sighs. “No, Taako, don’t take the fall for me,” he says. “This was my mistake, Lucretia. I got distracted and it was too late. I’m sorry.”

Lucretia shakes her head, pinching the bridge of her nose against an oncoming headache. “You fucking goofed, Kravitz,” she says. “Who died?”

“What?” says Taako, and at the same time, Kravitz says, “A funeral director.” Taako looks at Kravitz.

“What??”

“Kravitz can only bring people back for sixty seconds, or else someone else has to die to take their soul’s place in the Astral Plane,” says Lucretia. She glares at Kravitz. “You didn’t even tell him the consequences?”

Taako’s eyes widen. “Yeah, hold up, you didn’t tell me someone had to die for me to come back,” he says. “Fuck that, I’m not having someone else’s life on my hands.”

“His death is on my hands,” Kravitz assures. Another one. “He was dead before I even asked you to stay. The mistake is all mine. I’m… not proud.”

“Makes the worst thing I ever did seem pretty insignificant,” says Lucretia. 

Taako sighs. “Okay, listen. We’ve all made mistakes. Kravitz, probably, has made a few worse ones, but we’ve all made ‘em.” He looks down at Angus. “Maybe not boy detective over here. But honestly? I’m glad I’m alive. Not so glad about that cat dying instead, but like, I’m sure whoever… what was that fool’s name?”

Kravitz thinks for a moment. “Greg Grimauldis.”

“Greg Grimauldis?” Taako has the most stink eye expression Kravitz has ever seen. “Fuck that guy actually. We dealt with him for our aunt’s funeral and he ripped us hella off and stole shit from her fucking corpse. Scratch what I was actually gonna say, my life is definitely more valuable than his.”

Lucretia snorts and shakes her head. “What’s done is done, I suppose.”

“Plus I’m sure you know that there’s no better witness for a murder case than the murder victim,” Taako adds. “And I sure would like a cut of that reward money, since all my assets have been divided and liquified and whatnot.”

“I love this idea!” Angus chimes in. “If you don’t mind, can I ask you a few questions about death sometime?”

Taako raises an eyebrow. “And you are?”

“Angus McDonald, the world’s greatest detective! Well, not yet, but I’m on my way.”

“Precious.”

“We’ll talk about it,” says Lucretia tersely. “Let’s just focus on the investigation and we’ll sort out the Taako situation afterwards.” She looks at Kravitz. “You’re not off the hook.”

“I understand,” he says. Lucretia nods, and gestures for Angus to follow her out the door. Kravitz doesn’t breathe properly until the door is shut and he’s sure that no one’s about to burst in for one last remark. 

“Oh, shit, I should have given them some of my muffins,” says Taako. “I have so many.” He’s lounging with his arms stretched across the back of the couch. “So when were you going to tell me about the dead dude, my man?”

Kravitz’s heart sinks. “Today, I promise.” He’s not sure it’s a lie.

Taako raises an eyebrow. “Uh huh. Kinda sounds like a before conversation, though.”

“That would have required premeditation,” says Kravitz. “And you being alive is probably the least premeditated thing I’ve ever done. Still, I’m sorry.” Second-least premeditated. Now’s probably a good time to bring up the aunt thing, but Kravitz’s throat closes up before he can even open his mouth. 

“I forgive you, but you know how you can make it up to me?” His grin is wicked and Kravitz doesn’t want to know the answer. “I want out of this goddamn apartment. I’ve only been here less than a day and I’m already sick of it. You’re not gonna keep me Rapunzel’d up in here just because I’m legally dead.”

“Of course not,” says Kravitz. “I’m not going to lock you up, I just don’t know how we’ll manage to keep you from being recognised. You’re not one of those faces that fade from memory, and you’ve been all over the news for a week. People will recognise you.”

“And I want my old job back,” Taako continues. “I worked too hard on building my brand to let it die just ‘cos I did. And you don’t have to worry about recognition, because I’m here to once again save the day.”

 

Kravitz hasn’t been to the Pastral Plane yet. Lucretia and Angus did most of the preliminary research on the case, including interviewing Taako’s employees. Which proved to be very useful, now, approaching the counter as a stranger hoping for a job interview. 

Even this late in the evening, the bakery is still quite busy, with half of the tables still patronised, and the woman working the counter bustles ceaselessly between them as they clear. She looks up when the bell above the door rings. Ren was second in command when Taako still worked here, and seems to have taken the reins in his absence. She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. 

“Hey, uh, we’re pretty much closed right now,” she says. “I’ll sell ya something from what we have left, but no dine in.”

“Oh, we’re actually here for an interview?” says Kravitz. Ren’s eyes widen, and she smacks her forehead.

“Oh, duh,” she says. “I’m sorry, I completely forgot. Gimme a sec.” She directs them out to an office behind the counter, then disappears out the door again. The desk is stacked high and precarious with loose papers and cardboard boxes dot the floor. Taako eyes it critically. 

“Can’t believe I was the only one keeping this place in order,” says Taako. 

Ren returns after a moment, completely frazzled. She breathes deeply for a moment, then takes a seat in front of them. 

“Thanks for waiting. I had to get Joaquin to cover counter,” she says. “Ever since Taako…” she clears her throat and lets the sentence hang. “Everyone’s kinda jumped ship. They’re all afraid we’re about to go under and they wanted out while they still could. Only me and Joaquin left. But me ‘n’ Taako worked too hard on getting this place up and running to let it fall apart that easy.”

“Absolutely inspiring,” says Taako. “It’s that kind of dedication that I’ve always looked up to about this place.”

Ren smiles. “Thanks. I really hope this works out. What was your name again?”

Taako smiles and sticks his hand out for a shake. “Name’s Justin Kessler.”

Kravitz hadn't been sure when Taako first suggested disguise, but he hadn't needed much convincing, because it’s a damn good disguise. Taako’s wearing a blond wig in a short bob with box bangs, and big circle framed glasses and green contacts. His assortment of freckles covered, and even his face seems, somehow, more sharp and angular than usual. His flashy style discarded for simple colours and oversized sweaters, and his piercings removed. It looks like Taako if you squint, if you know that he's still alive. But different enough that anyone else would chalk it up as a case of an unfortunate doppelgänger. 

Taako hands Ren a Tupperware container full of assorted baked goods that he made the night before. “I went to the same culinary school as Taako, but he graduated, like, three or four years before me? But I used to go to his secret cooking seminars-slash-philosophy classes, and they were really good and really inspiring. And when I found out he died I was just like… what am I even waiting for? You know? Life is short, grab it by the horns, as he used to say. So I’m chasing my dream. I really want to open a place like this of my own someday, so I really wanna learn the ropes from you.” He says all this in about three breaths, so quickly that Kravitz can barely even follow it all.

“You went to those seminars too?” says Ren excitedly. “They were great, right? That’s where I met Taako and we got the whole idea for this thing in the first place.”

“They were so good, I wish I went to more of them while I had the chance.”

She sighs. “Yeah. He was pretty great.”

Kravitz stares at Taako incredulously, marveling at how easily he slipped into this other role. Ren looks at Kravitz now. “And what about you?” she asks.

“Uh, I’m Keetz McKravitz,” he says. “I just go by Kravitz, and, admittedly, I’m no chef, I just…” Taako may be a natural actor, but Kravitz played tree number three in their ninth grade production of The Wizard of Oz, and he struggles to think of a convincing lie, because ‘Private Detective investigating your business’ probably won’t go over well.

Taako jumps in to save him. “Taako’s boyfriend,” he says. That’s not what saving is. Ren frowns.

“Really? I’ve never seen you around here before,” she says.

Kravitz sweats under the scrutiny, face dark. “Yes, well… I was a bit of a workaholic, never around much. We used to fight a lot. It wasn’t until after he… passed, that I realised what I was missing.” Kravitz doesn’t know if he looks convincingly distraught.

“We met at the funeral and had a deep and meaningful conversation and kind of convinced each other to do this,” says Taako, cleaning up the debris. 

“I want to be close to his legacy,” Kravitz adds. “This was his place and he was really proud of it. I think he would want me to be here.” He glances at Taako, who bites his lip trying not to laugh. 

Ren looks somewhat sympathetic, but not… entirely convinced. 

They’re interrupted, suddenly, by the door crashing open. “Hey, Ren, just grabbin’ the last- oh shit, didn’t realise you had guests.” Lup stands in the doorway, and Taako gasps.

Lup’s eyes land on Kravitz, and she frowns. “Krav?”

“Hey Lup.”

“It’s no problem, Lup, grab what you need,” says Ren. “You know Kravitz?”

“Yeah, he was our neighbour like years back,” says Lup. 

“And Taako’s boyfriend,” he adds, and he locks eyes with her and pleads with her to run with him on this. Lup’s expression cycles through a dozen emotions in a split second. 

“Yeah, and Taako’s boyfriend,” she doesn’t hesitate. “Hope you’re doing okay, Krav.” She collects a few of the discarded boxes. “I’ll see you around, Ren.” She lingers on Kravitz. “Hey, actually, Kravitz, can I talk to you outside after?” She raises an eyebrow in a way that means ‘you don’t get a say in the matter’. Kravitz swallows and nods. 

She looks at Taako and freezes, squints at him for a moment, like a part of her knows but can’t figure out what she knows. His head is down and knees are shaking. Lup shakes her head, crestfallen, and closes the door behind her. 

“You guys are looking pretty good,” says Ren. “I should probably call your references or whatever, but you both have Taako connections, and he was nothing if not a supporter of nepotism.”

Taako laughs, a singular syllable. He’s still shaking, and Kravitz wishes he could hold his hand or do  _ something  _ to comfort him. He should have known that Lup might be here. 

“I’ve gotta help Joaquin close up,” Ren continues. “but I’ll give you a call tonight and let you know when you can come in for a trial shift.”

Kravitz nods, and stands up. “Thank you so much, we really appreciate it.”

Ren ushers them out of the office, then attends to a nervous teenager trying to bus tables. Lup is waiting by the counter, sans boxes, cleaning under her nails absent-mindedly. Taako can’t stop staring at her. Kravitz puts a hand on his shoulder. “Did you want to wait outside?” He asks. Taako swallows and nods, buries his hands in his pockets and his head to the floor as he makes for the exit. 

Kravitz clears his throat, and Lup looks up with a start. “Thanks for covering for me,” he says. 

“No sweat, babe,” she says. “You better have a damn good reason why you’re pretending to be my dead brother’s boyfriend or I’mma rat your ass out.”

Kravitz cringes. “In hindsight it was probably disrespectful to his memory to make that claim,” he says. Lup shakes her head.

“Nah, he would have gotten a kick out of it. I’m just super done with people using his death for their own benefit. You know how many people have been pretending to be his best friend so they get on TV or in the news or whatever the fuck? It’s sick.”

“Of course,” says Kravitz. “It’s nothing like that.” Well, it kind of is. “It’s….” he might as well tell as much of the truth as he can. He lowers his voice.“I’m on the team of investigators covering Taako’s case.”

Lup’s eyes widen. “Shit,” she says. “To be honestly, I wasn’t expecting that. It’s about damn time you got your asses into gear, I haven’t heard anything from you in a week.”

“My apologies, we’ve been… busy.” Understatement of the century. “We don’t have a lot of leads, so I’m going undercover to see what I can find out.”

“So do you  _ think  _ it’s…” She can’t bring herself to say the word.

“Not enough evidence to conclude either way,” says Kravitz. And then he thinks, fuck it, if anyone will know about Taako’s ex, it’ll be Lup. “There’s one lead that I can’t find any information on, but I think you can help me. What can you tell me about Sazed?”

“Fuckin’  _ Sazed _ .” Kravitz stifles a laugh at her exasperated tone. “Listen, I have a list of Sazed receipts longer than my thesis, and it has long been my wish to use them against that manipulative little fuck.”

“But do you think he’d be capable of murder?”

Lup flinches. “I don’t want to think about it. But he’s a bad person and treated Taako like shit for years and just the inconvenience of being investigated and interrogated is enough to warm my dead heart.”

Kravitz smiles. “I’ll try and make it as inconvenient as possible.”

“You sure know how to look out for a girl in mourning, Krav.” She shoots him finger guns, and they make their way out the door. She stops at her car. “Oh, by the way. Who was that dude with you? In the interview?”

“Uh, Justin.”

“He looks really familiar. Did he know Taako?”

Kravitz smiles a little. “You could say that, yeah.”

 

After seeing Lup off, Kravitz finds Taako in a side street behind the bakery, sitting on a discarded milk crate and gazing into the distance. Kravitz puts a hand on his shoulder. “That didn’t go-”

Taako jumps and looks up at Kravitz with wide eyes. He sighs when he recognises him.

“God, Bonedaddy, we need to get you a bell or something or you’re gonna kill me twice.”

Kravitz snorts. “What is  _ that  _ nickname?”

“Anyway, I think we got ourselves a little problem here, Kemosabe,” says Taako. “Namely: I’m gonna tell my sister everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kravitz, who doesn't know what contouring is: how did you do that with your face????
> 
> I want to say there's one more chapter but I don't trust myself to write or finish it so I'm gonna say this is the last one.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr at timeforlupsopinion


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